…great America….poor india

Ok before you guys go beating up on me for that statement, just wanted to let you guys know that, it is not my statement. This is one my mom oft quoted statements, whenever I don’t agree with her point of you. Its actually even higher than “you are more educated than me”(Which is false since she has two degrees to my one).

I am not going into the merits of the statements itself, I’ll leave it to the “nationalists” of both countries. The reason I brought this up is to talk about psychology! Ok I don’t have a psychology nor am I a psychologist but am sure a master at the defensive offensive strategy. That’s again a new phrase … I am talking about the way people usually lower themselves so the other would feel guilty.

It’s pretty useful if you want to say whatever you want and then hide behind the supposed direness of your situation. This strategy was pretty effective in college when a trio of us used to make fun of everybody and then would self-deprecate ourselves so others wouldn’t get a handle to make fun of us.

It’s usage that really bugs me though is when it’s an emotional blackmail and yours truly has given as much as he has got. My sisters have most often been my victims, the closer you are to me the more you would be emotionally blackmailed đŸ˜‰ while my mom and uncles have been pretty effective giving it to me.

So why am I writing this ?? Well just confessing my sins in the open so I won’t repeat them again… hopefully … and who is to be credited for making a saint out of a sinner? Somebody who is trying the greatest defensive offense on me.

If you can’t beat em’, join em’..
If you can’t join em’, bribe em’,
If you can’t bribe em’, blackmail em’..

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Anatomy of an Indian Movie

I am finally stepping into the unknown and writing about stuff that I have no business about, not that I had any business with the previous ones. But for a guy who hasn’t seen an Indian movie in well over 11 years, I do know a lot about it (Or so I think). Why would you let a guy who once infamously asked who Ramba(A then famous Tamil actress) was? The picture says it all.

All I need is one minute of the film to tell which of the general plotline it would take, so lets dig in and try to conjure up one right now. To begin with need a few songs with lots of dancing shot in various locations around the world. Then you need to decide if you want a love story between a rich girl and a poor guy or vice versa, this can be exchanged for a urban – rural matchup or a literate – illiterate match up. This will form the skeleton structure of the movie.

Next come the muscles, need to make the hero stronger than Superman, able to as the picture indicates walk with a bullet in the heart. Also needs strength to cut a bullet into two using a knife and kill two people using those sliced pieces. Also helps if the hero is always outnumbered 1000 to 1.

Ofcourse you need the heart which would be 10 minutes of crying for whatever reason it might be. Maybe everytime the sacrifice of the hero is mentioned, it could turn into a sob scene.

The skin is provided by the fairer sex, specially with their “item” numbers*.

There is no need for a brain in this anatomy, if it had one, there would be a stroke as soon as it started functioning.

No movie is complete without the perfect climax, a pot pourri mix of fighting, blood(preferably from the hero), death (of one of the hero’s close family/friend) and the triumph of good over evil.

If only I had the money or the backing of the underworld.

“I’ll be back.”

* Item numer -> When you have a pretty lass who has no connection with the storyline dance sensuously as a popcorn break during the boring part of the movie.

Credits to Vijay for the picture.

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